NEW YEAR'S REVOLUTION 2006 ELIMINATION CHAMBER

 Joey Styles, Jerry “The King” Lawler, and Jonathan Coachman are on commentary for this match.

Lillian Garcia goes over the rules before Kane enters the match and enters his pod, Styles says he’s the last entrant thanks to the Beat the Clock Challenge. Chris Masters enters next and this WWE title match is his birthday present, a shame it’s such a brutal package. Carlito fills the third pod, taking long enough for his music to begin its second run through. He was talking strategy with Chris Masters earlier tonight, which is a smart move for the young guys. Kurt Angle enters next and it’s always amazed me how the “You Suck” chant was able to help add to his legacy, but he feels incomplete without it. Cena defends from the beginning, facing Shawn Michaels. John Cena is booed all the way down to the ring. Shawn Michaels enters as Styles reminds us Vince McMahon picked him to start the match earlier in the night.

 

THE ELIMINATION CHAMBER

WWE New Year’s Revolution 2006 (8^th January 2006)

 

There’s a chant before they lock up that sounds somewhere between “CM Punk” and “Cena sucks” but I’ll presume the latter. Shawn Michaels starts working Cena’s arm, driving himself into Cena’s shoulder and transitioning to a headlock, then hammerlock in some nice chain wrestling. John Cena takes the path of least effort, knocking him back with an elbow. Shawn goes back to the hammerlock, but another elbow knocks him down, Michaels slaps Cena and is knocked silly with a right hand, Michaels is sent off the ropes into a back body drop but he sends Cena through the ropes onto the steel floor. Both guys stop themselves from being sent into the chains and Michaels shoves Cena back into the ring. John Cena’s head meets the turnbuckle and Michaels chops him around the ring. Cena is sent off the ropes but Michaels ducks early and gets kicked. The fans didn’t like Cena’s offense there so Michaels cuts it off to keep them onside. Shawn Michaels sends Cena into the corners, knocking him down. Michaels covers but it’s only 2.

 

 Shawn Michaels sends Cena’s head into the turnbuckle again, another chop makes Cena take a walk, but he reverses the irish whip, Shawn Michaels is stuck over the top rope, so Cena kicks him in the gut bouncing him until Michaels crotches himself on the top rope. Shawn Michaels clotheslines John Cena over to the floor as Carlito enters the match, eventually. Shawn Michaels takes a rest as the youngest man to enter the Elimination Chamber attacks Cena from behind. John Cena’s sent off the ropes, he ducks a clothesline but runs into a dropkick. Carlito turns his attention to Shawn Michaels, hitting a somersault senton over the top rope. Carlito makes his way back to the ring, Cena gets a couple of shots in but Carlito hits a reverse STO, he covers but Cena gets the shoulder up at 2. Shawn Michaels is climbing to the top rope from the outside, but Carlito brings him down to the mat and covers for another nearfall. He start knocking down both relative veterans with right hands, Carlito sends Cena off the ropes into a back elbow and hits Michaels with a suplex, Carlito covers Michaels but only gets 2.

 

  Carlito brings them both to their feet and Coach mentions that no one has retained their championship in the Elimination Chamber, which would be impressive if there weren’t only 2 former champions going into 3 matches. Shawn Michaels gets a nearfall on Carlito with a small package, Cena connects with some punches and the fans boo everything he does. Carlito gets a pop for cutting him off with a kick to the midsection but gets backed into the corner. Carlito kicks Cena again, cutting him off and chops him in the corner. He hits Michaels with a clothesline but Michaels says “fuck your clothesline” and takes a chop to the chest too. Carlito hits the ropes and runs into a double flapjack, this is the problem with strategies. Carlito can’t team with Masters if he doesn’t survive long enough. John Cena crawls over to cover Carlito but Carlito breaks it by grabbing the ropes, because THERE ARE RULES HERE, DAMMIT! The countdown to the next entrant begins as Michaels and Cena hit a double backdrop on Carlito. They carry on the teamwork until Kurt Angle enters the match, hitting everybody with german suplexes.

 

  Kurt Angle hits a belly-to-belly suplex on Shawn Michaels over the top rope, then struggles to take Carlito over with a german to the steel, so Carlito had to land on his knees and Joey Styles covered for them. I’ve just noticed Daivari climbing the chamber and cheering Kurt Angle on, making this my second match that he appears in a row. Angle unloads right hands on Cena in the corner and suplexes him, then goes back to Michaels, catapulting him into the chainlink right in front of (and above) the commentary area. Angle stomps on Cena in the corner as Michaels is shown bleeding. Kurt Angle sends him into one of the holding pods, breaking the “bullet proof” glass and leaving a smear of blood. John Cena start fighting back at Angle, backing him across the ring, Angle reverses an irish whip and sends Cena across the ring with a belly to belly suplex. Shawn Michaels uses the ropes to get to his feet and Angle suplexes him back into the ring. Carlito counters an Angle Slam, but Angle trips him and locks in the Angle Lock, Carlito holds on as the countdown to Chris Masters’ entrance elapses but we still have the searchlights and chains before he can free his partner. Chris Masters knocks everyone but Carlito down with clotheslines and sends Cena off the ropes into a powerslam.

 

  Chris Masters lifts Shawn Michaels overhead and plants him with a Gorilla Press slam and calls for the Masterlock. He tries to lock it on Angle, but it’s countered, possibly because he called for it so loudly. Kurt Angle puts Masters in the Angle Lock but John Cena breaks it with an F-U attempt on Kurt Angle, during an elimination match, for HIS championship. The crowd rightly boo him for that, but it’s negated by their “boo everything he does” reputation in this match. Anyway, Angle escapes Cena’s shoulders with a victory roll and puts the Angle Lock on him instead. John Cena tries to crawl to the ropes and to be honest his selling in the move is not his worst. He almost gets to the bottom rope but Shawn Michaels hits a Sweet Chin Music on Kurt Angle from nowhere! He covers and Kurt Angle is the first one out of the match! Carlito tries to cover Michaels, who is still on the mat from exhaustion, during the replay but Michaels kicks out. We see Chris Masters working over John Cena with an elbow to the top of the head as he pairs off with Cena. He slams Cena as Kane is waiting to enter the match. Carlito with mounted punches as Masters has Cena in a headlock, getting some shots in there, too. Carlito brings Michaels out to the chamber and sends him into the chains.

 

  Shawn Michaels is sent into the support beam of the chamber and he stumbles back into the ring as John Cena reverses an irish whip, sending Masters into the corner. Chris Masters stumbles out into a clothesline by Cena but Carlito is there to stomp Cena, giving Masters time to recuperate. Masters and Carlito double-team Cena, Shawn Michaels starts moving so Carlito lays some stomps into him too. Kane finally enters the match, an uppercut to Masters, then a back elbow to Carlito. Chris Masters eats a big boot and Kane divides and conquers, sending Carlito over to the floor. He hits a powerslam on Chris Masters and climbs to the top rope, Carlito tries to cut him off but is swiped away. This gives Masters time to meet Kane in the corner, getting to the middle rope. Kane blocks a superplex and shoves Masters down to the mat. He hits the flying clothesline and sets up for the Chokeslam. Shawn Michaels gets to his feet at the worst time, Chokeslam to Michaels! John Cena takes one too, leaving them both laying. Kane grabs Carlito by the throat over the top rope, but Chris Masters cuts him off and tries to put on the Masterlock. Kane powers out and uppercuts Masters but Carlito has entered the ring and hits the Lungblower on Kane. Masters and Carlito celebrate their team as Kane sits up. He hits Masters with an uppercut and hits Carlito, but the numbers game catches up and they hit him with the double DDT, JUST TO DO IT AGAIN! Sitting up used to mean something in a Kane match. They kick Kane down, Chris Masters press slams Carlito on top of Kane and both of them cover to eliminate him.

 

  Carlito takes Shawn Michaels out to the floor again as Masters and Cena exchange right hands. At one point Masters was knocking Cena back into the ropes with right hands, like a variation of an 80’s spot and it was pretty cool. Chris Masters rakes Cena’s eyes and hits a suplex as Carlito grates Michaels’ face against the chains. Chris Masters sends Cena over to the floor as he double-teams Shawn Michaels with Carlito. Shawn Michaels is sent off the ropes but he ducks the double clothesline, knocking Carlito down with the jumping forearm. He kips up and hits Masters with an inverted atomic drop, then one for Carlito. Chris Masters is knocked down before Carlito gets clotheslined to the floor, Shawn clotheslines Masters over the top rope too, and scoop slams Cena, who made it to his feet. Shawn Michaels somehow makes it to the top rope and hits the Elbow Drop on Cena. Shawn Michaels is too tired to cover and Lawler mentions that it helps Masters and Carlito more than anyone. They start moving on the outside as Shawn Michaels knocks Cena down with a Sweet Chin Music. Carlito runs interference, Shawn tries to fight back, knocking them both with right hands, but an inverted DDT corkscrew drives him into the mat, Carlito covers, eliminating Shawn Michaels from the match. Chris Masters covers Cena as Styles tries to put over how big this is for the match, but Cena kicks out at 2.

  Chris Masters start double-teaming Cena as no one with a working brain can think why this is happening. John Cena is sent across the ring but holds on to the ropes. He knocks them down with a double clothesline. He repeatedly clotheslines them both then puts Masters down with a fisherman suplex. He hits the Protobomb on Carlito which sets up for the Five Knuckle Shuffle (I still have no idea how they got away with it for so long) Chris Masters cuts off the F-U and sends Cena over the top rope. Chris Masters tries to send Cena into the chains but it’s blocked. John Cena cuts off Carlito but gets DDTed on the floor. Chris Masters helps Carlito to his feet and after a bit of a chat decide to send John Cena, who’s now busted open from the DDT into the chains. Cena stumbles through the ropes back into the ring and they pounce again. Carlito and Masters hit a double suplex on Cena, he’s lifted onto the top turnbuckle and they hit a double back suplex, planting him on the mat. Carlito tells Masters to put Cena in the Masterlock. Chris Masters has it locked in, John Cena tries to fight it off, but he mule kicks Chris Masters, Carlito rolls Masters up after the low blow, taking it down to 2, but Cena immediately rolls up Carlito to win the match.

WINNER: JOHN CENA (STILL WWE Champion)

This wasn’t my favourite Elimination Chamber match. Shawn Michaels seemed to be there as a veteran, to keep the match together, but Kane could have done that after he entered. The Chris Masters and Carlito alliance was a nice thread but it seemed too long and basic. Kurt Angle got a nice run as he entered and shouldn’t have been the first out. Not a bad match, but it didn’t seem to mean much considering it was for the title. [**½] 3/10.