1995 ROYAL RUMBLE MATCH

I've cowered out of doing these enough, I need to review at least 1 Royal Rumble match. I should probably expand on my rules for “250 for 2020” I am only counting the winners of the match, except in this case I will include the final four.

Vince McMahon and Jerry “The King” Lawler providing commentary for this match. The winner of this match not only gets the WWF Championship match at Wrestlemania, but will also be accompanied to the ring by tonight's special guest, Pamela Anderson. Howard Finkel can't stop himself from smiling as he announces her to ringside for the match. Lawler claims to have a date at a special restaurant with Anderson, giving McMahon an easy road to make a Burger King joke. Shawn Michels enters #1, with #2 British Bulldog joining him to start the match.

1995 Royal Rumble match

WWF Rrumble 1995 (22^nd January 1995)

Michaels jumps Bulldog before the bell rings, backing him into the corner with rights. Bulldog shakes off some jabs and reverses an irish whip sending Michaels into the corner and he walks out into a backdrop. Michaels is sent into the ropes and lifted overhead before Bulldog slams him. Shawn Michaels is sent into the corner, ending up on the top rope before tumbling back into the ring. Bulldog with a few rights ties Michaels up in the ropes. British Bulldog runs into a boot but Michaels misses an elbow drop as Eli Blu enters the match and goes straight for Bulldog, but Michaels goes after Blu, mounting the middle rope. Bulldog interrupts, before turning his attention to the fresh man. British Bulldog tries a slam that turns into an elimination attempt. Shawn Michaels assists Bulldog but Ei Blu begins to fight back. DukeDrose is in #4 and eats a boot by Eli Blu. They pair off with Michaels attacking Drose in one corner with Bulldog and Blu across the ring. Bulldog tries to get Blu over the top.

Duke Drose fights out of the corner and slams Michaels down and Blue drops Bulldog with a clubbing blow. Drose has Michaels in a bearhug until HBK pokes him in the eye. Michaels sends Drose down but is sent across the ring by a punch from Blu. Jimmy del Ray is #5 attacking Drose in the corner, with interference by Blu. Michaels and Bulldog are brawling across the ring. Drose and Eli Blu double-team Del Ray until Eli walks off to Bulldog, Michaels grabs Drose from behind, giving Del Rey free shots. Michaels turns on Del Rey, but ends up in the corner. British Bulldog comes over to help Del Rey as Sione enters the match at #6. Shawn Michaels lands on the apron as British Bulldog decides to attack Del Rey, leading to Michaels hitting Bulldog with a flying ax handle. Sione picks Michaels up, trying to send him over the top rope, but across the ring Jimmy Del Rey is eliminated by a running clothesline by Bulldog. Eli Blu attacks Sione, saving Michaels to fight another day. Michaels takes a breather as Bulldog and Drose go at it in the corner.

It doesn't last long, Michaels sends Sione's head into the top turnbuckle but it has no effect. Michaels is dropped with a headbutt as Dr.Tom Pritchard enters from The Heavenly Bodies.He goes for Eli Blu in the corner as Sione tries to eliminate Shawn Michaels again. Michaels grabs the top rope and lands in the ring. Eli Blu attacks Pritchard in the corner with shoulder blocks as Michaels scrapes Sione's head across the top rope. Sione and Duke Drose try to eliminate British Bulldog but he survives as Doink the Clown enters #8 and they all switch brawl partners. He goes straight for Sione as Michaels escapes another elimination, but Sione and Eli Blu double-team the new entrant. Duke Drose is trying to eliminate Shawn Michaels as Kwang enters #9 and goes straight for British Bulldog. They interrupt different elimination attempts as “every man for himself” confuses itself for “crowd the ring, don't let anyone out” up until Rick Martel enters the match #10. Leaving 1 elimination for the first third of the entrants. Duke Drose and Eli Blu are fighting in the corner, Sione and Dr. Tom Pritchard double-team Bulldog for a bit and Kwang is trying to eliminate Shawn Michaels in another corner. Meanwhile Martel almost eliminated Doink, but got his head sent into the top turnbuckle. #11 is Owen Hart but he is followed down the entranceway by Bret.

Bret Hart attacks Owen, leading to agents coming out to pull them apart. Owen had interfered in Bret's WWF Championship match earlier in the night against Diesel. Leaving everyone in the ring to brawl until TimothyWell runs past the chaos to enter the match at #12. British Bulldog meets him with right hands as Owen Hart and Duke Drose are eliminated in quick succession, with Lawler pleading Owen's case on commentary. Timothy Wells takes a weird bump into the turnbuckles and he becomes the next casualty. Sione sends Rick Martel over to the floor, with Michels doing the same to Pritchard. Sione sends Doink over to the apron and a superkick by Kwang sends him out of the match. Bushwacker Luke enters the match #13 as Eli Blu sends himself and Sione over the top with a clothesline. Leaving just Bulldog and Michaels in the ring.

Michaels meets Luke with rights, Bulldog tries to interfere but gets knocked down and Luke is out in less time than it would take to get his gear on for the match. Lawler makes reference to Luke's 4 second participation in 1991 as Michaels goes for the attack on Bulldog with an ax handle, then chokes him on the mat. British Bulldog is brought to his feet, he blocks a suplex and hits a delayed version on Michaels as Jacob Blu enters. Quickest Royal Rumble or not, these are ridiculously short intervals. Jacob Blu flattens Michaels with a clothesline and knocks Bulldog down, another right hand to Michaels and then they fluff it up a bit. Jacob Blu runs the ropes and gets low-bridged out of the match. Bulldog knocks Michaels down and carries him around the ring before trying to eliminate him. Shawn Michaels wraps himself around the ropes and gets some shots in at Bulldog, scrambling back in the ring as King Kong Bundy gets us half way through the entrants. King Kong Bundy starts hot and tries to force British Bulldog over the top rope, Michaels holds him from behind for a bit for reasons, trying to make it look like he's contributing then cuts off Bundy's elimination attempt.

Entrant #16 is Mo from Men on a Mission, but he runs straight into a backdrop from Bundy to take him straight out of the match. Jerry Lawler is overjoyed at this for some reason. British Bulldog goes for Bundy and Michaels jumps on Bundy's back, but they're not working together. They awkwardly move over to the corner and Michaels gets dropped. British Bulldog sends Bundy from one corner to the other but can't pick him up for a slam leaving Bundy to club him across the back. King Kong Bundy isn't sure whether to choke Bulldog on the top rope or try to take him out of the match, deciding for somewhere between the two. Shawn Michaels gets to his feet and decides to leave them to it, taking a rest in the corner. Possibly the smartest anyone's been in this match and possibly all Rumble matches in history. Mabel makes his way out #16, leaving Michaels and Bulldog in with two superheavyweights. Shawn Michaels pairs off with Bulldog, leaving Mabel and Bundy to go at it, which is exactly as exciting as it sounds. Bushwacker Butch is #17 so Lawler prepares his stopwatch. Mabel eliminates King Kong Bundy in the slowest way possible, his feet hitting just as Butch slides in the ring.

Bushwacker Butch goes straight for Michaels with rights and lefts, trying to avenge his tag partners elimination, but a rake to the eyes cuts him off and he's sent out too. So in 4 eliminations we just switched the big guy to face the starters. Mabel headbutts Shawn Michaels and takes him into the corner, British Bulldog tries to help with the assist but Michaels is able to fight his way back into the ring as Lex Luger enters the match. He eliminates Mabel just as Lawler makes him a “maybe” pick to win the match. He runs through Michaels with clotheslines and lifts him overhead, then slams him to the mat. British Bulldog tries to help Luger eliminate Michaels, but again HBK survives as #20 is revealed to be Mantaur. He makes a bee-line for Luger as Michaels gets on the top rope, Bulldog attacks Mantaur from behind and they pair off. Michaels hits Luger with an ax handle from the top. He attacks Luger with rights to the midsection from his knees, bringing him down in the corner as Mantaur shoulder blocks Bulldog in the opposite corner.

British Bulldog is sent across the ring with a hip toss and Mantaur connects with an elbow drop as Michaels chokes Luger in the corner. Lex fights out of the corner and Mantaur tries to eliminate Bulldog, but Lex Luger interrupts it. Aldo Montoya is out #21 and I've never been so happy to see him. He goes straight for Shawn Michaels as Luger and Bulldog double-team Mantaur on the other side of the ring. Michaels cuts him off and attacks him in the corner. Bulldog and Luger try to eliminate Mantaur on one side of the ring as Michaels is on the offensive for an elimination attempt for a change. Mantaur powers his way back into the ring so Luger thinks fuck this, keeping Montoya in the match too by attacking Michaels. #22 is Henry O. Godwinn who goes straight for Mantaur, then decides Aldo Montoya has him covered (he didn't) and walks off to find Luger instead. We get a shot of Pamela Anderson trying to look interested in the match as they brawl.

#23 is Billy Gunn with his mullet, he attacks Mantaur as Michaels tries to get Luger over the top rope, Gunn tries to take Mantaur out of the match as Aldo Montoya saves Luger as Mantaur switches the momentum on Gunn, Michaels pokes Montoya in the eye. They continue brawling between themselves as Bart Gunn enters #24. The Smokin' Gunns will be defending their WWF Tag Team Championships tomorrow night on Raw against 1-2-3 Kid and Bob Holly. Bart is met by Mantaur, Billy sees this and ignores it, going after Bulldog and Michaels instead. Aldo Montoya tries to help Bart eliminate Mantaur as Luger attacks Godwinn in the corner. Bob Backlund is #25 but gets followed by Bret Hart, who pulls him from the apron and beats him down at ringside. #26 is Steven Dunn who is Timothy Wells' tag team partner (if you guessed the name of the team, then well dunn I guess?) and we see Bulldog with his ankle tied in the ropes, he gets free as Steven Dunn attacks Aldo Montoya, but Luger puts a stop to his momentum before eliminating Mr. Backlund, who has just officially entered the match and is shouting at someone at ringside.

Bret and Backlund brawl in the entranceway until the arrival of Dick Murdoch at #27. He doesn't discriminate, dishing out right hands to everyone in the ring until Michaels and Godwinn corner him. Murdoch hits a noggin knocker and Adam Bomb is out #28 and goes straight for Steven Dunn. The Smokin' Gunns stick close to each other, focusing their energies on Murdoch and Montoya, with Billy sending Montoya's head into the turnbuckle. Mantaur crosses the ring to hit Luger with the Avalanche in the corner. Shawn Michaels survives another elimination attempt by Henry Godwinn as Mantaur lifts Luger and teases sending him over the top before Adam Bomb cuts him off. #29 is Fatu way too late to be any use to his tag partner. He squares off with Billy Gunn and sends him over the top rope, but Gunn slides back into the ring. Adam Bomb is attacking Michaels in the corner whilst Luger struggles to eliminate Mantaur. Shawn Michaels survives, getting beaten in the corner as Crush is our final entrant. The Smokin' Gunns turn on each other, trying to force each other out of the ring but Crush and Dick Murdoch use their own momentum against them. There are still 10 men left in the match, including the two that started it all.

Just as I say that Aldo Montoya backdrops Steven Dunn out of the match, it looks like Murdoch is going send Aldo out too, but he survives so we get a split-screen of the match and Pamela Anderson. They go back to brawling between themselves and we miss a Samoan Head spot from Fatu and Shawn Michaels. Dick Murdoch tries to eliminate Michaels but is cut off by Luger. He sends Fatu over the ropes and tries to follow up with crawling headbutts, making the same mistake Michaels did, Fatu takes the headbutt and Murdoch is hurt, allowing Fatu back through the ropes. Adam Bomb charges Crush but gets sent out of the ring and you can see the effect this match has on Bulldog's hair. Crush sends Fatu over the top rope and celebrates too early, as Fatu is back in the ring, attacking Crush with rights and a thrust kick. Aldo Montoya is sent over the top rope and out by Michaels, Murdoch tries to sneak up on Michaels but again Luger cuts the elimination off. Fatu is sent inside out with a clothesline then gets eliminated, both by Crush. DICK MURDOCH HITS A DROPKICK! How did the announcers glide past that? He then picks Godwinn up for the worst wrestling move in history, the aeroplane spin, knocking Michaels out with Godwinn's boot. Dick Murdoch tries to dump Godwinn out of the match, but goes over too and gets eliminated.

Henry O. Godwinn brings himself back into the ring. They back into the corners, with Bulldog and Luger showing an alliance, Shawn Michaels jumps on Luger's back to kick off more brawling, Crush takes Bulldog to the other side of the ring but Bulldog tries to force him over the top rope. Godwinn teams with Michaels against Luger, but Michaels leaves them to it in order to attack Bulldog. Henry Godwinn sends Luger from corner to corner but is met with a big boot and Luger explodes out of there with a clothesline. Godwinn fights to his feet, backing Luger into the ropes but gets eliminated as he charges. Shawn Michaels and Lex Luger go at it as Crush has Davey Boy Smith on the floor. Lex Luger turns around and socks Crush in the mouth, leaving Michaels and Bulldog to pair off once again. Shawn Michaels goes back over to help Crush try and eliminate Luger, breaking off to drop Bulldog again. Luger fights his way out of the corner and mounts the second rope but a dropkick by Michaels and a shove by Crush take him out of the match.

Numbers 1, 2 and 30 are left in the match, with Michaels trying to make an alliance with Crush for the 5 minutes or so needed. After coming to terms on the verbal contract, Crush agrees and they stomp at Bulldog. Crush and Michaels hit a double clothesline and shake hands, but Crush double crosses him! Crush kicks Michaels in the gut and lifts him overhead, teasing an elimination. Crush takes too long and Michaels rakes at his face to get his feet back on the mat, ducks a clothesline by British Bulldog that eliminates Crush and leaves the two that started it to finish off the match. The fans go insane for this revelation and in the worst acting of her life, Pamela Anderson applaudes them from her seat. They exchange rights, Michaels rakes Bulldog's eyes and sends him off the ropes. Shawn Michaels ducks too early for the back drop and gets kicked into the second row, but settles in the corner. Bulldog sends him across the ring and kicks him in the ribs as he's draped over the corner, bringing him back in. Bulldog lifts Michaels overhead, dropping him so he straddles the top rope. Bulldog moves the rope, bringing Michaels in again and runs the ropes to clothesline him over the top rope. Davey Boy Smith starts celebrating and his music plays but Shawn Michaels attacks him from behind and dumps him out to the floor. The referees announce Shawn Michaels as the winner and Howard Finkel announces that only one of Michaels' feet touched the floor. Leading to a replay to confirm this.

WINNER: SHAWN MICHAELS

That was a real chore. Royal Rumbles are a bitch to do so I started with one of the shortest and it still felt like forever, It took me two separate sessions to review this match, there was a lot of non-sensical elimination stoppage in this edition and the tag teams in at the same time barely added to the story. The highlight to me was Bret's inclusion when Backlund and Owen were set to enter. Too many people were just there to make up the numbers, getting eliminated quickly and ironically my other problem was the pacing of the match, with the ring getting crowded a few times in the match without much happening. It was interesting seeing Michaels and Bulldog going the distance and the clarification on eliminations needing both feet to touch the floor for them to count.– [**] match but personally 1.5/10

So in summary the people I have counted for these reviews are: Jim Duggan, Edge, Shawn Michaels, Crush, British Bulldog, Lex Luger, Rey Mysterio, Asuka & Hulk Hogan.