JONATHAN COACHMAN VS. EUGENE

 Earlier in the night, Eric Bischoff was seen with Coach, he says William Regal won’t be at ringside so Coach needs to rid the WWE of Eugene, because he’s an embarrassment. Coach notices Eugene in the distance so Bischoff goes to speak to him. Eugene thinks Uncle Eric doesn’t like him but Bischoff explains that he’s helping Eugene. He says he doesn’t want Eugene getting an injury like Triple H or Chris Benoit had. He says Eugene can pack his things now and Eric will call off the match, he can tell everyone he had a great time, or he can wrestle. Eugene wants to wrestle.

 

Jim Ross and Jerry “The King” Lawler are on commentary for this match.

Coach makes his way out first, William Regal walks to the top of the ramp with Eugene and tries to give him some advice, Eugene excitedly makes his way to the ring and JR is pushing the “dreams come true in the WWE” line.

 

JONATHAN COACHMAN VS. EUGENE

WWE Bad Blood 2004 (13^th June 2004)

  Eugene asks for a handshake, Coach is reluctant but tries to squeeze at Eugene’s hand, but Eugene has “Special Strength” Jonathan Coachman puts Eugene in a headlock but is sent off the ropes, Eugene leapfrogs, then curls up like Johnny Saint. It’s not something American audiences will be familiar with, though.

  Coach pushes Eugene and he rolls around, Coach asks what Eugene’s doing and Eugene releases one hand, asking for another handshake. He brings Coach down and covers for a nearfall as JR takes joy in Eugene winning the battle of wits. Eugene has Coach in a headlock but is sent off the ropes. Coach goes prone and Eugene gets on his hands and knees next to Coach. Eugene ducks Coach’s punches and rides him like a pony. Yeah, people paid for this event. Coach interrupts a lock-up attempt with a knee to the gut and clubs Eugene across the back, before going back to a headlock. Eugene sends Coach off the ropes and they criss-cross in a nice 80’s throwback until Eugene leaves the ring and grabs a teddy from a woman at ringside. Coach is still running the ropes for a while before noticing he’s alone with the referee and going out to attack Eugene. He sends Eugene and the teddy back into the ring but the referee takes the teddy out. Eugene is sent through the ropes but he rebounds back and headbutts Coach in the midsection.

  Eugene snapmares Coach and puts him in a bodyscissors and rolls Coach around. Eugene follows up with Junkyard Dog headbutts but then puts his spin on it by miming pissing over Coach. Jonathan Coachman brings out a woman in a bikini carrying cookies. The referee advises Euegene to stay in the ring but he wants a cookie too, dammit! Eugene slowly approaches the woman and takes some cookies, sharing them with fans at ringside before Coach bounces his head off the cookie tray. Eugene is sent back in the ring, Coachman sends Eugene’s head into the top turnbuckle but it fires him up, he punches at Coach, who looks to go down too soon, Coachman is sent off the ropes into an inverted atomic drop, then the conventional version. Eugene dropkicks Coach then picks him up for an airplane spin and rolls through, dropping Coach on the mat. Garrison Cade appears at ringside, holding Eugene’s teddy (well, the fan’s) and he rips the head off.

  Eugene brings Cade to the apron by his hair but Garrison Cade holds Eugene’s arms. Jonathan Coachman charges but Eugene ducks and Cade is sent into the barricade. Coach walks into a Rock Bottom and Eugene hits the People’s Elbow for the win.

WINNER: EUGENE

 It did it’s job, it was a short match to showcase Eugene and made Coach look like an asshole. It wasn’t needed for Pay Per View, but this is how the first brand split had things going. [*½] 2.5/10

Garrison Cade gets in the ring but is cut off with a Stunner from Eugene, William Regal comes back out and raises Eugene’s hand.